5 Signs You are Fearful of the Workplace Bully

Some people will never get any further than they are in their positions simply put because they have been deemed a bully whether they know it or not.  You see, workplace bullies are like those school yard bullies in old movies, they feed off of verbally insulting and physically assaulting others.

1.  You avoid this person whenever you can.

Whether it is taking the long walk to the bathroom rather than the short one pass the bully's desk, you worry about this person saying or doing something to you.

2.  Your stomach drops whenever he or she comes around and you nervously attempt to compose yourself.

How many antacids do you take?  It's obvious that you are letting this person negatively impact your health.  Schedule a doctor's appointment and take some personal time off!

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

3.  You lie to the bully so that he or she isn't angry at you.

Fearful or worried that he or she will punish you in some way, you tell lies and more lies just about every time the bully asks a question or wants you to do something.

4.  You attempt to befriend the bully by sharing information that your co-workers shared with you.

Integrity is a thing of the past for you.  Whatever the bully wants to know to keep you out of trouble, you give it to him or her, if only your co-workers knew, you are the mole!

5.  You do almost anything the bully asks without objection even at the risk of getting fired.

The bully convinces you it is "okay, alright...I'll cover for you."  You know it is unethical, but you don't care just so long as the bully stays off your back, but what might the owner or investors think?

If you have this kind of stress as a result of a bully in the workplace, it's time to talk to someone in Human Resources, an unbiased manager or seek another job.  Bullies aren't worth losing your health or wealth!

Nicholl McGuire is the author of What Else Can I Do on the Internet? and other books.  Get your copy today!  She is also the owner of this blog. 

How to Deal with Workplace Bullies

Workplace bullying is more common than you might think – according to a survey from job-search site CareerBuilder, some form of bullying has been experienced by 28% of U.S. workers. (Link: http://www.cbsnews.com/news/bullying-a-common-problem-at-work/] This bullying can range from verbal abuse to other actions that are harder for the victim to understand – such as purposely not being invited to a meeting or project, being gossiped about, or having different sets of standards and policies applied.

Now that more study is being done on the causes of workplace bullying, it’s also becoming easier to find resources to deal with workplace bullies. According to many experts, the most obvious tactic – confronting the bully face-to-face – is also the tactic that you most want to avoid, especially with your career and reputation on the line.

Instead, the Workplace Bullying Institute recommends a three-step target action plan for dealing with workplace bullies. [Link: http://www.workplacebullying.org/individuals/solutions/wbi-action-plan/]

The first step is coming to grips with the fact that you are being victimized. This means ignoring all of the colorful terms usually used to gloss over workplace bullying – such as the term “difficult boss” – and recognize bullying for what it is.

Once you have accepted that you might be a victim of workplace bullying, the second step is to begin taking steps to ensure your physical and mental health. This includes consulting a therapist or other health expert who can help you with the strong emotions you must be feeling.

It also means doing a check of your physical health, since instances of workplace abuse often lead to physical problems, such as hypertension and chronic headaches. These physical ailments are brought on by the stress of dealing with a bully.

The third step involves a more active phase in dealing with the workplace bully. If you have decided that you wish to remain at your workplace and not find a job elsewhere, then you must begin building a case against the workplace bully that involves specific documentation of what happened and when. It also means researching specific federal and state statutes that might cover workplace bullying under laws dealing with discrimination.

Finally, suggests the Workplace Bullying Institute, you need to build the business case against the workplace bully. Bullies are often effective in wooing others over to their campaign of bullying – usually by forms of subtle intimidation – so you will need to appeal to strict, bottom-line analysis of the problem.

In short, you will need to prove that the workplace bully is simply “bad for business” – he or she is someone who negatively impacts the running of the business or, in extreme cases, is responsible for the loss of clients and revenue.

The risk in all this, however, is that your employer may find grounds to fire you rather than deal with cases of workplace bullying. This is the same problem faced by victims of other bullying – including domestic abuse, in which the veiled threat is that a relationship will end if the bully (the domestic abuser) is exposed.

However, with this three-step approach to dealing with workplace bullies [Link: http://www.workplacebullying.org/individuals/solutions/wbi-action-plan/], you can optimize your chances of dealing successfully with a bully and restoring your work life back to normal.

The Four Workplace Bully Types

Tips on Tackling Various Workplace Issues

Competition and increased need for profits has led to businesses becoming more and more money oriented and concentrating less on people or staff issues. Many businesses fail to realise the value of its employees, who can be equated to the most valuable resource available in any company. In failing to do so, they actually fail to recognise or acknowledge the various problems faced by the employees while performing their jobs. This leads to a disgruntled work force, which in turn leads to lower productivity and ultimately lesser profits.

Therefore, as an employer, it is essential that you try and create a secure work atmosphere, where the employee is assured of your complete attention. Prior to creating such an atmosphere, it is essential to understand the various issues faced by employees in the workplace. Such an understanding will help you in developing a workable strategy.

1. Stress in the workplace

This is one of the most common workplace issues faced by employees. Stress in the workplace can lead to lower efficiency, lower productivity, high levels of tension and conflict, all of which ultimately leads to an unhealthy work atmosphere. This could also cause employees to take more leave of absence because they do not want to face the stress.

In order to combat such stress, you can try and promote a healthy work atmosphere by trying to respond as positively as possible when confronted with any stressful situation and being more supportive of your staff, especially when they are under stress and pressure. By trying to understand their problems and by being supportive, you are actually building a relationship of trust and giving them a sense of being understood, this is often enough to help alleviate the intensity of the stress.

2. Bullying and harassment in the workplace

Harassment or bullying in the workplace is another common issue, which creates an environment of fear for employees. Such feelings normally translate into lower productivity and efficiency, which in turn leads to lesser output and profits.

Life coaches and business coaches feel that in order to deal with harassment in the workplace, it is essential to counter the negative elements while promoting the positive aspects. You may try and deal with all the negative aspects in your office and make it clear to all that such behaviour is intolerable.

Additionally, however, you could also try and create a positive work atmosphere by making certain changes in the office lifestyle. This will help in promoting self confidence amongst those employees who have been victims while deterring those bullies from repeating such behaviour.

3. Conflict and dispute resolution

Life coaching also deals with issues related to conflict and the effect of such conflict on our lives. Conflicts are common in all aspects of our lives, so also in our career. While it is not possible to have a conflict free workplace, you can try and keep conflict levels to a minimum, and aim to create an atmosphere of security, safety and trust.

Handling conflict in the workplace can be achieved by remaining calm and focused on the issues at hand, instead of getting drawn into the conflict. Similarly, ensuring that you intervene at the right moment is also equally important in effectively handling a conflict. It is important that you see yourself as a mediator, trying to resolve the dispute between two employees rather than getting yourself embroiled into the whole issue. Amicably resolving issues is the key towards success in handling conflict in the workplace.

4. Fear of discrimination at workplace

Employers often walk the tight rope just because they do not want to be accused of being discriminating. However, what they do not realise is that this decision often creates an atmosphere of fear in the workplace. Business coaching principles state that in order to avoid such issues it is important that as employers you try and create an atmosphere of trust, where people can opine freely as well as raise issues that could be termed sensitive.

5. Tackling aggression in the workplace

Stress and high levels of conflict leads to aggressive behaviour, which affects the atmosphere at work and therefore it becomes essential to tackle the same before it affects the productivity and the efficiency of the staff. You can try and formulate policies and regulations for controlling such aggressive behaviour at workplace. Business coaches feel that having a written policy or code of conduct in place will go a long way in ensuring a stress free work environment and in instilling confidence in the staff.

There are many such issues that are common in the workplace. While it is not possible to deal with all such issues, the above are the main ones that can affect the overall productivity, if not taken care of. The tips given above are an indication of some of the various methods possible to tackle workplace issues and is not a complete list. Many workplace issues can be tackled by using your imagination and creativity along with presence of mind.

All the best,

Natalie Dee

London Life Coach & Business Coach

Natalie Dee is a specialist in life coaching and business coaching with clients throughout the UK and worldwide. To find out more, visit http://www.natalie-dee.com

Coaching promotes confidence, fulfilment and success in peoples' lives. Life coaching and business coaching creates change in communication skills and self confidence.

In her business capacity, Natalie offers a range of coaching services including one-to-one coaching and professional workshops.

Natalie Dee is also the co-author of an ebook on self confidence, for more details visit her website (as above).

Can There Be A Psychopaths At Your Workplace?

Do Psychopaths exist in the workplace? Better yet can a psychopath appear in your life at your workplace?

Psychopaths are usually seen in roles of self centered individuals who care about no one but themselves who do great harm. Their motto may well be “I don’t do anything that is not in my interest and that I do not get my piece – right away”. Or it may be that this deviant behavior is below the surface and never noticed or apparent.

It is often said in retrospect that the “Axe Murderer” was a quiet person who kept to himself, may have been a good family man and bothered no one.

Psychopaths are usually seen in serial killers, rapists or sadists in Hollywood movies. They appear in the media and literature. Think of an early model as the Zodiac Killer in the Bay area of San Francisco. However these same people and personalities are never expected to cross our paths in real life. Yet it is estimated that approximately 1 percent of the general population fits the mold. It’s only a matter of time until you cross paths with a psychopath in real life at your workplace or place of employment.

What exactly is a psychopath? In clinical psychology a psychopath is defined as a condition characterized as a condition characterized by a lack of empathy or conscience, poor impulse control and / or manipulative behavior.

How can you determine whether a fellow worker is a workplace psychopath? A leopard does not lose their spots. Similarly psychopaths, either on the loose or under fire may well indicate or revert to certain personality traits and behaviors.

First of all does the person show no remorse no matter how much they exhibit mean behavior – whether it be victimization, talking behind the backs of fellow employees or worse and backstabbing. Is the person more than an excellent talker – a story teller of lies? Even if caught with lies and deceit do they show no remorse – just switch tack with another tale – as if everyone else is both foolish, a mark and that they are smarter than everyone else. It’s as if the world is there to be plundered – for their enjoyment and pleasure. Watch for the pleasure that such people take in their deeds of trouble. Everyone makes mistakes or may be forced into situations that they would prefer not to be in. The difference is that these people relish and are proud of these deeds and events – when it should be the other way around.

Sometimes these people are loners. Some of the times they will even function in groups. It can even be family groups to rip off and plunder everyone else outside of their close (or perhaps not close and self hating) group of vagabonds and carpetbaggers. Such individuals and groups can be seen to prey on people’s weaknesses and insecurities – especially low self esteem. It’s as if the undertone is “If you do not do what I want …. Give me possessions or money that I want … You cannot be part of the group ….. Or you will face abandonment.”

It’s not uncommon in the workplace but these people have an abnormal, almost pathological fear of failure. “I must be number one” is their constant internal motto. Along with that they may well rush to take credit for other people’s work and successes. Again these traits are not those of psychopaths – yet the pattern of such behavior and personality traits along with the rest of the ball of wax should raise alarm bells in your mind.

The problem is that these psychopaths do not only negatively affect a few people in the organization. Given a level of authority in modern large corporations the effects and damage that these psychopaths can be great. If a psychopath considers everyone else, especially people they have outdone or outsmarted as downright foolish or even stupid rather than helpful souls who were taken advantage of and in addition the psychopathological culprit shows no guilt for making decisions that negatively affect the company, shareholders or employees then this is a recipe for great disaster and heartaches . Think of Tyco, Adelphia Communications, Enron and WorldCom.

Bay Area WordManitoba Job ShopAce-Training.

Companies self-destruct when workplace bullies run amok!

I have vivid memories of being bullied when I was in the fourth grade. Darrell would line me and other classmates up each morning and extort our lunch money under threat of beating us to a pulp! Darrell had already missed about two grades and towered over everyone. We were thoroughly intimidated. Growing tired of watching other kids enjoying their lunches I came up with an idea. I'll tell my mom about it and she will get him off my back! I knew my dear mother would show me empathy.

Wrong! She gave me one of the worst thrashings of my life and said, "Don't you let that boy take your lunch money. I'm going to call your teacher tomorrow to make sure you eat lunch." Now I was really in a jam, I had to decide who I was more afraid of Mom or Darrell! I didn't get an inch of sleep that night and the next morning went off to school hoping to hide from Darrell. Unfortunately, he caught me before the homework bell and proceeded to pound me for refusing to cough up my lunch money.

During the course of the fight I remember being cheered on by other victims of Darrell's tyranny. Mercifully, the teachers arrived and saved me from further punishment. I looked at Darrell and to my amazement, I had actually bloodied his nose! As we were marched to the principal's office, I was cheered and patted on the back by my classmates. I also got a lot of attention from the girls in my class. I explained to the principal about Darrell's extortion racket and mom's response. He sent me back to class and Darrell was suspended for a week. After that, I never had any more problems with Darrell. We in fact became good friends.

Unfortunately there are "Darrells and Darrellettes" in the workplace who are just as intimidating to fellow employees. Standing up to workplace bullies can be just as frightening for the victims. Workplace bullying can take on different forms such as

psychological abuse
physical abuse
emotional abuse
verbal and non verbal abuse
sabotage of the victims work product

According to Wikipedia workplace bullying, "is the tendency of individuals or groups to use persistent aggressive or unreasonable behavior against a co-worker." From my workplace experience, I have witnessed bullying of customers, vendors, visitors and other interested parties! Bullies in the workplace often take advantage of their power by...

humiliating
insulting
affronting and confronting
intimidating

...the "target" of their abuse. Many times this behavior is played out in front of witnesses to destroy the victim's self esteem. When management allows bullying, trust in the workplace is nonexistent. Studies show that when there is an environment of distrust, employees tend to perform poorly. So bullying is bad for business. when employers are aware of bullying from employees and managers and do nothing to correct it, they share in the negative consequences. Workplace bullies come in all shapes, genders, races and sizes and have a great need for control. Here are the four basic types of workplace bullies.


Yellers

They always have to talk over the target(s).

Blockers

This type likes to undermine the reputation of the target and destroy work product.

Backstabbers

Self explanatory, they work in the shadows spreading ugly rumors and gossip aimed at the target.

Nitpickers

This bully lives to find fault with everything the victim does no matter how trivial. The bully will trash any suggestions by the target for improving workplace performance and efficiency as well.

A national poll conducted by the Workplace Bullying Institute says 37 percent or 54 million American employees have been or are bullied at work. Gary Namie, director of the Institute says, "It’s a silent epidemic". Workplace bullying is also called "mobbing" when two or more managers or employees gang up on a victim. Co-workers who witness bullying have increased levels of low morale and stress. Employees who are the targets exhibit...

insomnia
stroke
depression
migraine headaches
low self esteem
high levels of stress disorder
suicidal tendencies
greater risk of heart disease

Because there are no laws protecting employees from bullying there is no clear definition for it. That makes it hard to distinguish from other behaviors such as sexual and racial harassment. To this point, the federal government has no workplace bully laws. Businesses and organizations by and large don't have policies to prevent it. However, several states have proposed legislation to provide employees some protection. There are some things employees can do to protect themselves.

Learn more about it
Stay calm
Promote your good work
Inform management of the problem(if the bully is the manager go over his/her head)
Understand the bully is the problem not you
Keep good records detailing the bullies behavior over a period on time. This includes names, dates, times, places, witnesses, etc.

Try to get the bully to create a paper trail for you. You would be amazed at how easy it is to get people behaving badly in the workplace to email their negative intent toward you. I have successfully used email that required a response to accomplish this. Keep all the documentation you receive from the bully that helps you prove his/her accusations against you are false.

Finally, if possible always try to have one or more witnesses who aren't intimidated or a part of the bullies "mob" around as witnesses to what is said and done.

Raising awareness and making a stand like the one I did against Darrell are the most effective ways to discourage and prevent workplace bullying. Seeking legal guidance is always an option as well until specific laws are passed to protect employees.

Yancey Thomas Jr. has functioned as a certified and trained mediator in alternative dispute resolution of employment and general civil issues for over 10 years. He is a national panel mediator/neutral through the Cornell University Alliance for Dispute Resolution with emphasis on employment/workplace disputes. As an employee, he has a unique perspective on how to prepare for employment. Yancey's you can learn basic employee rights site offers the job seeker and employee more information on achieving workplace success! Follow this link for more relevant info on workplace bullying.