He is often anger, she is hyper active, and you feel like you are in over your head! How do you deal with an over the top personality at work? Here are some basic solutions to help you keep your cool while on your job.
You may remember the wise Proverb from the Christian’s Bible that says, “A soft answer turns away wrath,” how true this statement is! If someone speaks loudly to you, rants about everything that is going on around them, and you respond with a low, controlled voice having very little if anything to say, usually they won’t want to be in your presence for long. They may also calm down when they realize they are looking like a fool in front of you or become so angry that they quickly dismiss you from their presence.
If what they say is shocking and offensive, rather than immediately react, try walking away while saying, “I need to take a bathroom break. Do you want anything from the vending machine? I need to take care of another issue, I will come back later.” Many hot tempered people resort to name-calling, threats to physically beat up someone, and other things that can cost them their job and/or their freedom. As much as you would like to say or do something to get even, remember anything you do has not only a negative effect on the one you are doing it to, but you and those who know you will be impacted as well.
The first thing you will want to think about when dealing with a person you know it’s not completely a master at self-control is to find ways to keep yourself busy. When you make time for a person like this, he or she will always look for you to listen to them whenever they are having some kind of crisis or meltdown. Always have something going on and never encourage their negativity by giving him or her lots of eye contact, nodding your head or acting interested. Laughing or teasing can easily be misunderstood by someone who is in a rage. If you joke around at the wrong time, your crazy boss who was once upset at someone else will most likely become upset with you which will ultimately trigger a negative reaction within you toward your boss.
Another thing you will want to consider when dealing with a hypersensitive personality type is how he or she interacts with others and how others respond to them. When you find you don’t know what to say or do around this person, watch how others react. Find a way to react to him or her that you are most comfortable. In this way, you are in control of how you feel and not the other way around.
Next, if your boss seems to be happy one minute and cursing like sailor the next, avoid approaching him or her with a concern if you can find someone else who can assist you. This mentally unstable person may direct their negative attitude on you, just because you brought them yet another problem they feel obligated to solve.
Third, think of ways you can always look good in his or her sight. This angry person may be your secret weapon one day in case you need someone to help you fight a battle in the board room, court room or wherever you need support in the workplace. Find out what his or her favorite music is when he or she is mellow, listen to the conversations they are having with others, and take the time to study their mannerisms and wardrobe. You may learn a thing or two about your boss that no one else has noticed and this small detail may win you brownie points with him or her.
Lastly, avoid wasting a hot tempered boss’ time by complaining. Remember you want to be a part of the solution not a part of the problem. Whenever you approach your boss, get to the point, find a way to communicate a 10 minute discussion into a five minute one. Ask questions when you don’t understand something and never assume you know-it-all when you don’t. When the time comes to meet with your boss about a concern, provide him or her with appealing visuals if you know this person likes them and also to help you illustrate your point, but if you don’t know whether your boss likes pie charts over statistics and you aren’t quite clear on the subject matter you are attempting to present then you are setting yourself up to be the next victim.
Hot tempered bosses could care less about what others think. They aren’t usually the likeable type, they usually don’t have many friends, and they don’t really like people but tolerate them because they need a paycheck. Don’t expect an angry boss to hand hold, micro manage, or spend a lot of time repeating his or her instructions, difficult bosses prefer fast learners who make them look good, and are readily available when they call – simply put a good slave!
Nicholl McGuire
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